Sharon &

Archive for August, 2009

“The Hog Roast”

by on Aug.04, 2009, under The Family

I have two lovely friends…. who live close by….I know them through their children being friends with my girls. Now one of my friends wanted to hold a surprise 40th for her husband and the other friend generously agreed to host the party at her place. (she has a stunning property and plenty of “fields” to pop marquees upon….I offered the “Disco”……party done!

I spoke to my friend a week before the party, and she told me she was going to get a “hog roast” (that would be the food covered then!!)

I did not relish the idea of a poor pig roasting…but even worst was the thought of Alethea (my 7 year old budding Animal rights protester) becoming either upset or demonstrating…..this is the little girl who threw a “wobbly in Iceland because I had meat in the trolley and refuses to sit at the table on Christmas day because of a turkey losing it’s life!!!!!

I have to go to the party…..we are the “Disco”……

I can’t take all the kids and leave Alethea behind……

I can’t not take the kids – a party promised….emmmmm…my school hols would be torture….


PANIC!!!!!! How do I get round the fact that this “hog” is going to be “roasted”…..and Alethea is going to be in the same field!!!

I chose to ignore the fact for the next seven days……

Party day…….I decided to feed the kids their tea before we went….knowing full well that Alethea will not be amused….and to cut down on the amount of “flesh” that Athena would eat in her attempt to tease Alethea!!!

Kids bathed….and off we go….I had a dull feeling in my tummy….Alethea was just going to flip, seeing what is obviously a small cute piggy speared and slowly roasted (even I was having doubts as to whether I could cope!!!!)

 ….would she tie herself to a tree? stand and stare at the people eating the roast? or sing “this little piggywent to market….only change the words to

“This little piggy went to market,

This little piggy stayed at home,

This little Piggy was hog roast,

This little Piggy had none,

This little Piggy said thank **** all the way home….


or words to that effect!!!!!!


We pulled up….no sign of the hog roast…..good!, maybe they are doing it round the back!!

The sense of pure relieve when my friend told me she had changed her mind…..and gone for the more traditional “cold meat” buffet…..BLISS!!

Me, Alethea and the poor pig were spared……   ;O)

The party was very good…..and at about 11 o’clock most the guests started to go….. which, after a bit a tidying up left me and my two friends and a couple of jugs of Pimms…..when I say a couple of jugs…..I mean a jug each with a straw!!….childish eh?

Childish.....but great fun!!!

Childish.....but great fun!!!









I was completely hammered an hour later!!!



Now I live in a relatively quiet village…..apart from the odd person or two staying at one of the local caravan parks, coming into the village……or the local “Tenant valley run” (a bus hired that does a “pub crawl)…..on Sunday that all changed…

I travelled through the village “barking like a dog!!!”

At this point I am not ready to discuss as to why?  and strongly believe that counseling or tablets may help……lol

could have been worse….I could have “oinked” all the way home……


one hung-over Sharon…..x

3 Comments more...

Looking for something?

Use the form below to search the site:

Still not finding what you're looking for? Drop a comment on a post or contact us so we can take care of it!